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Home > In The Middle > Building Attraction

Throw out your Funny Stories (3)

Continued......

The buying temperature routines and all that increase her internal energy. If you really raise it she can almost be bouncing there on the spot she is so frazzled on the inside. A 2 minute little bit can allow them to relax and just listen to this guy for a second. Slow down and regard him like they are in a fish bowl looking out and you are not asking them to do anything. You can slow it down and allow the laughs to breathe. You can tag-line them. The jokes are not at her expense. It is not a verbal sparring situation. You are holding the floor. You are funny. You can structure a question probing situation after the bit to get them asking for more. This gives you a litmas test to how interested they are, and you don't need to be continually stacking openers and changing the direction of the conversation with new topics / themes. It holds your set together.

The last thing "funny stories" want to be however is something that might come across as like that chick from American Pie who is always telling stories about "band camp" that no-one cares about. When you do a comedy routine you need to ask yourself why the listeners would be interested to listen to any of these. How do they relate to the listener? Can she empathise and question her own views and life because of them? Are they funny? Is there a point? Like a reason she would want to listen besides hearing about a story with you as the hero? The way I tell comedy bits is to get to something deeper underneath, or to get to a punch line. Never self-indulgently. This is all for attract phase, before the isolation / palm-reading.

What I do, in comfort building is have conversations where I am talking about something deeper than surface stories. We need to be sharing dreams, ambitions, life philosophies. I slow the fuck down and ensure it is relaxed. No high energy routines where I am pushing stories. A high energy can kill the sarge. Like she is relaxed, it is post palm reading, and now you are interacting with her like she is already your girlfriend. Jokes need to be quirkier, rather than the belly laugh outrageous kind of the attract phase.

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OK, I get where you are coming from on this. Sure, there are advantages to
becoming a regular, and I am all for getting in with the regulars as social
proof. It makes going out easier because you can arrive alone and you know you
can walk in and shake hands and have a base to work from. I agree. I actually
make those regulars my base WHEN I AM ALONE, so my criticism is a bit rich. But
when I have a wing, I leave them the fuck alone because they get in the way.
On 2/11/04 4:12:31 PM, Harmless wrote:
>For me, it’s useful as a
>FRAME. You are "a guy walking
>around" whether
>you use this frame or not, but
>if you come from the frame
>that you’re
>the A-crowd, it’s easier to
>believe in your own value and
>act congruently.
Sure. If it gives you confidence to do that first approach, well and good. But
the secret is to get into set almost straight away.
>So true. What I’ve noticed
>in-field is that MOST guys
>look at the 3s
>rule like this:
>
>I just walked into the bar...
>ok.. 1...2...3... APPROACH.
>Ok, I’m not
>going anywhere with this girl.
>EJECT. 1...2...3...
>APPROACH... EJECT...
>1...2...3... APPROACH... EJECT
>1...2...3.. etc.
Yeah, that is what I talked about in the post I just made above. You can not
look like you crashed and burned. Here is the secret to that: "Guys, it was
nice meeting you". "Make the ho say no" is wrong, wrong, wrong. You go into
set, you get into your material. If it is not going well and you are
interrupting a conversatoin where one girl was just telling the other about how
Ben cheated on Rachel yesterday and Rachel doesn’t know and are not interested
in anything but chasing up all the gossip, you just "nice meeting you" and move
on. Like before they tell you to go away. You can not crash and burn. You have
to stick in set. Put out a false disqualifyer to keep you in set for social
proof if you have to: "So my girl-friend over there was saying ..." point into
the other corner of the room as if she is here.


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