Nine Steps to a Solid Day 2

I met a girl recently, and I set up a day 2 and got her contact information. As I was saying goodbye, I told her to kiss me on the cheek. She refused. So, I started thinking "if she refused a kiss on the cheek, then she is going to want to go slow, or waste my time." So, I took out the piece of paper that had her phone number on it, and I started crossing it out. I told her that it was off. (Of course, I was smiling and being nice about it, but I was also very serious.) She quickly came after me… "no, no…" and, she gave me a great kiss. Needless to say: she arrived very enthusiastically at our day 2. She knew that she should appreciate the opportunity.

Step 6: Get her phone number.
Ok. Once you've tested and tested again to make sure that she is attracted to you, and feels comfortable with you. And you know that you like her. And, she has committed to a day 2 with you. Finally, you can get her phone number…. At this point, it's almost assumed. She will have to give it to you. You don't need any tricks or special lines…. You just tell her: "Alright, what's your phone number?" Assume she is going to give it to you, because it is obvious that you will need it. If she doesn't want to give her phone number now, something is wrong. If she doesn't give her number, go back a few steps and start again. She might not give you her phone number because she lives with her boyfriend, or she has some other legitimate excuse. Be sensitive of this. However, if she just doesn't want to give you her number, be weary of a flake.

Step 7: Call the number right away.
Once you get her number, call her right there. First, this will ensure that you got the right phone number, and second she will have your number on her caller ID.

A favorite routine that we teach in our workshops (credit: Wilder) is to call her right there and have a conversation with her on the phone. She will be right next to you of course. Tell her that she must be excited when you call. Have her practice enthusiastically saying "Hey, Dan… Wow! I'm so happy you called!" Make her say this, or make her express some enthusiasm and excitement. Even if she is partially faking the excitement, it will help her convince herself that she is excited. Have a short phone conversation with her and tell her "ok, now we've got our first phone call out of the way, so next time it won't be awkward."

Remembering why women flake, we want to appeal to her social group. There are two approaches you can take. One, if she is with a boyfriend, etc. Be super discreet, and show her that you can be discreet. Have her tell you her number and memorize it, and don't whip out your cell phone in front of everybody. Be smooth.

On the other hand, if her friends all like you and want to help her, then be very explicit. Tell her friends what you are doing. You can even ask them if it's ok. Her friends will love this, and then they will be pressuring her to go out with you. Great! Now she has to show up.

Step 8: Plan on calling her to confirm the day 2.
Tell her that you will call to confirm the day 2 plans. If you tell her that you are going to call, then you won't seem needy or nervous when you do call. She will expect it. You can even schedule a time when you will call. If she flakes on your phone call, then you can bet she will be likely to flake on the date.

Step 9: Contact her before the actual meeting.
Always follow up with her to confirm. You can call or send text messages. If she is a more socially active girl, you might want to call more often because she probably meets a lot of guys and might forget about you. For example, you could set a day 2 for 10 days in the future, and then call her every 4 days to keep in her memory. When you call, don't just confirm, but add some additional information. ("oh yeah, and make sure to bring a bottle of wine. Etc…")