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Nine Steps to a Solid Day 2

Step 4: Have her imagine the future plans with you.
After you've found an excuse to meet, and you've found out when she's free, it's time to sell her on the day 2. You don't have to make it sound like the most amazing dream date ever, but you should describe it with enthusiasm, and make it enjoyable. Have something planned and describe it well. If you are going to a café, tell her that "it's this great little café near my house and they get the best coffee beans imported, and it's a cute little older couple that owns it, etc. etc…." If you aren't excited about the day 2, then find something more exciting. She should be excited. Remember, you don't want her showing up just for some fun activities, you want her to be meeting YOU. So, set it up as a fun time that you two will have together.

Tell her what you're going to do and get her imagining it. Give her lots of details. Get her to really think about what you are going to do. And, when you talk about the day 2, use the word "we." Another key to eliminating flakes is to really get it into her mind, because this will make sure that she sets her intentions. Take her mind into the future and imagine the day 2 together.
Here's an example (credit: Grant):
"We're going to be walking through the park, and it's going to be windy…. And you'll hair will get all messed up, and you'll ask me if it looks alright. I'll say "yes", but actually you'll look like a total dork."

Don't ask for the date, don't ask her "do you prefer coffee or dinner?" and definitely don't ask her "what do you want to do?" Don't bumble through it like you have no idea what you're doing. Tell her what's going to happen. And when you're done, she should know what to expect. Tell her what to wear, and when to arrive. Tell her that she'll have to buzz the front door, tell her what to say when she sees you next time.

Grant has a great little routine that adds details in all the right ways…
He'll ask: "What kind of perfume do you have?"
Her: "Chanelle, etc.."
Him: "Wear the chanelle."

To help the process of getting the day 2 into her head, have your day 2 planned. Know what you're going to do so that you can really describe it for her. Have this written into your routine stack, if you have one, so that you know what you're going to say. Make it sound fun and exciting and get her feeling the excitement. This shouldn't feel like you're overselling, but rather just showing enthusiasm for something that you know will be fun anyway. Make sure she knows what's going to happen, so she feels the excitement and visibly wants to meet up with you.

Make sure you have a good day 2 planned. I'm not going to go over what a good day 2 is, but if it is too difficult for her, or requires too much commitment from her, then get a new day 2 plan. If it's too easy for her, she might be more likely to flake because she's thinking it's not too important. You want it to be just right. And, always bring her into your reality.

Step 5: Make her say "Yes."
Get her to agree to it! Now, this is where you really want to test her. Make her say "yes, I'll be there! I can't wait to come!" Make her say it with enthusiasm. At this point, it's better to get her to say "no," or to express her objections, than to have her flake. A lot of guys wont test her, because they are afraid she will say no, but it's better than her not showing up.

Don't accept a weak "ok." Cancel the plans, if she wont commit 100%. Tell her that you've changed your mind. This is good for two reasons…. One, it will save you the time of waiting around for a girl that MIGHT show up. And two, it will show non-neediness and scarcity that will often generate more attraction and actually motivate her to commit. A high value guy doesn't want flakes because he doesn't have time, so if the girl isn't really committed, a high value guy will not bother. Demonstrate this. Don't be afraid to turn her away.

See Also

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