How To Get A Social Life

Getting a social life isn't all that hard. The problem is that most people make and keep friends without really thinking about how they do it.

This article kindly provided by Chris at www.succeedsocially.com

They just picked up the skills automatically as they grew up. If you've always been more of the shy, loner type than you'll probably appreciate some pointers.

Pretty much anyone can have a group of friends if they want to. Here are some things you may want to get covered first though to make things easier:

1. You're fairly friendly and personable and aren't completely annoying to be around.
2. You have basic conversational skills (these are probably better than you think, especially if you're comfortable with the other person or share a common interest).
3. You can invite someone out to do something with you.
4. You know some fun things you can do with other people.

Take the attitude that you've just moved into town and need to make a new circle of friends from scratch
There's no point in having the image of yourself as being a desperate, lonely loser.

Get an outside life on your own

Go see some live music, go check out the local bars and have a drink or two by yourself, go see some stand-up comedy, go to a sports bar and watch the game, start going to a rock climbing gym, take some classes, if you're in college then join some associations and clubs, walk around interesting neighborhoods, go to any interesting local events advertised in the paper, if you're going to read or play on your laptop you might was well go to a coffee shop to do it, etc., etc., etc.,

Doing these things will take the edge of your loneliness. It will make you a more interesting person. It will also fill your head with knowledge of things to do and places to go when you are hanging around people.

Also just being in situations where there are people around, even if you're not interacting with them all that much, gives you some of the feelings of having a social life. There are plenty of chances to meet people as well obviously.

Figure out what types of people you think you may want to hang around and be friends with

Once you know this you'll have a better idea of where you need to be to meet them. Also, are there certain things these people are interested in or knowledgeable about you need to brush up on in order to be around them more easily?

It's easier to hang around people similar to you. If you're a RPG fan at heart, you'll have a pretty simple time meeting and hanging out with other RPG fans.

That sounds obvious, but if you don't like who you are, you may not want to hang around similar people because it acts as a mirror that reflects your short comings back at you. Even though you may want to improve yourself, you should be comfortable with who you are right now.

Know something about the nature of friendships

If you're inexperienced with making friends, you may see the process as being more drawn-out and complex than it really is. Often all you have to do to make a friend is meet someone you naturally click with and hang around with them enough. Before long they'll be your friend.

No friendship is perfect. Everyone has some mildly annoying traits that their friends will put up with and eventually adapt to.

Guy friendships are generally more shallow than women's and are often based on common interests and doing things together. This isn't necessarily a bad thing, it's just different. It also means it can be pretty simple to hang out with guys. Just be the buddy they drink with, or the guy they watch sports with, or the dude they go see bands with.

Meet some people

People are everywhere. All you have to do is meet them is be somewhere they are and talk to them. Here are some places where you can find them:

1. Classes