How do I get laid

4) GETTING THE FIRST MEETING

5) GETTING THEM TO MY HOUSE AND CLOSING THE DEAL

Underpinning all of these is my self image, confidence, personality, and all of that other intangible bullshhit that takes a bit to get under control. so let me address how I got that together before I talk about what I do specifically. (By the way. this is the most important part of what I'm writing right now. All the rest has flowed from my attitude and confidence. not the other way around. So if you read nothing else, read this. not the other parts.)

I've been studying NLP and hypnosis for years. since before it was cool. because I have always been fascinated by how people work. So I began by creating self image exercises based on NLP and Timeline therapy, and doing them all the time. (Read Frogs Into Princes by Bandler and Grinder and The Secret of Creating Your Future By Tad James) I also started keeping a personal journal of everything that I was learning and doing, so I could reflect on it. And MOST IMPORTANTLY I found and started to hang around with guys that GOT LAID LIKE CHARLIE SHEEN. This was the biggie. I owe much of my success to the guys who showed me in the real world what they did to get laid. It wasn't the books and the people selling tapes and seminars. It was the real world guys that were getting laid. What I do now resembles nothing that I've really read in a book or learned from a guru (With one or two exceptions that I'll share later). So the BEST advice I can give you is to find about 5 guys in your area that know what the shhit they're doing, and say "Hey, I really want to get this part of my life handled. can I take you to dinner (no kissing) and pick your brain man?" Be humble and cool, and you'll make some friends. Like I said, find about 5 different guys so you can get different perspectives and see how it all fits together. By the way, go read the chapter in Think and Grow Rich about the Mastermind as well. IF YOU DO NOTHING ELSE, DO THIS ONE THING. IT WILL MAKE THE DIFFERENCE. If you DON'T do this part, shut your mouth, and keep your learning cap on, you'll be one of the guys that writes to Cliff saying "Well, when Mystery had this chick that said "I really love it when a man just sweeps me off my feet" why didn't he use the skydiving suckerfish pattern instead of kissing her?"

Those of you that know what I'm talking about say Amen, please. (I had to say that for us)

I decided recently to start studying comedy, as I've found that women respond to it better than any other thing in the whole goddamn entire universe. So I did a bunch of reading on the internet to find the best books, and I bought about 5 or 6 of them. One book that I'm reading right now called "Comedy Writing Secrets" by Helitzer made a great point... He said that most of being funny is the CHARACTER and not the jokes. Most of the guys that I meet who want to learn to get laid are working on the jokes. I did it for about two years myself. Tried to learn all the patterns and all the lines and all the bullshhit. It finally dawned on me that women were not really that concerned with all of that. they wanted a particular CHARACTER. The lines didn't much matter, as long as they fit in with the character. Now that I have created this CHARACTER for women, things are all different. Women now call me. They pursue me. They want to be around me. It's fukking strange and magical and weird.

 
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Part 2

So what's the character that they want? Good question.

I have a good friend who's the best I've ever seen at picking up women in bars and having sex with them that night. Now, I do better getting numbers and closing the deal later. But this guy just kicks ass. And his whole mindset towards meeting women is to be "Cocky and funny" (his words). My opinion is that women are turned off by arrogant men. UNLESS. they're DAMN FUNNY. This magic combination will attract women like this list attracts guys who don't get laid. I'm following in my buddy's footsteps.

I'll try to summarize my character for you: "I know that this chick is secretly trying to pick up on me. I'm going to play hard to get, make fun of her, be indifferent towards her, and generally bust her balls as much as possible. I know that she loves a guy that is so sarcastic that it makes her nervous, so I'm going to really keep the heat on. and when she starts to show any interest at all on the outside, I'm going to blow her off and make her prove to me that she wants me. so I can reject her again."

I do crazy shhit like if I'm standing next to a girl at a bar, I'll turn to her and say in a completely serious voice "Will you PLEASE stop touching me?" And then look them right in the eye.

Or say "What are you doing at a bar for godsakes? Can't you find a nice normal guy? Or are you desperate?" All with a completely straight face.

I say things that make them actually think that I'm serious, but leave a shadow of a doubt.