Being A challege - Being The Prize

"You're my new girlfriend.. No wait, you don't have x-whatever? We're broken up." is not a fractionation technique. It's highly competent flirting, but its not *actually* conveying that you don't want her in a way where she really believes it.

**If I had to pinpoint one reason why guys who come to this stuff have trouble getting results, its what is outlined in this post. Girls are used to sex going down in a certain way. Walking up to girls and overtly trying to pick them up goes against what they're used to. It's a violation of social norms.

Girls will tolerate it as cute, and they'll be interested to see what you'll do. But they'll rarely sleep with you (unless they are at a certain point in their lives where they are open to the idea, which I'll post about below in terms of "fuck rationalizations" - and this does happen often, which accounts for alot of the success that we see with other styles of approaches). Guys go in trying to convince the girl, when they should be BAITING the girl into convincing THEM. As a result, most of the bold moves that guys who come to the scene attempt, wind up not yielding any results.

So back on female psychology then, why do girls like *actual* hard to get guys?

Girls naturally enjoy having their buying temperature pumped up high. So if they can get those emotions out of an interaction, without worrying that the guy will exploit her suggestible state and have sex with her, then she can just get all emotionally aroused around him, and enjoy it. Of course what happens from there is that she backwards rationalizes it, and then convinces herself that she legitimately wants the guy. From there, she decides that she's going to get the guy, and starts chasing him in a manner as unsophisticated and blatantly obvious as how a pissed drunk AFC would chase a girl that he wants at a party. She'll kino him, giggle and scream around him, compliment him, signal her friends to help her, and try to isolate him.

Notice, as this post goes on, that this last paragraph explains why just getting a girls' buying temperature up high is not good enough, and that she actually has to chase. It's because of the backwards rationalization process, and the sexual hook point that she crosses over as a result. The S/C switch (screen/chase) gets flipped.

There are also issues of validation at work. Notice that if you tell a girl "I hate you", she starts touching you immediately, and begs to know why. Notice that if you engage the whole set, but actively ignore the choice girl, she'll start trying to get you to talk to her. This is all validation. It's more validating for the often insecure hot girls, to sleep with a guy who will reinforce that she is beautiful.

Think about your last cute girlfriend. She was cute. She was great in bed. But sooner or later, you got used to it, and took it for granted. Your relationship started stagnating. Then you're out at a party one night, and all these guys are giving her attention. Her friends are there, and she's having a great time just doing her own thing. All of a sudden, she looks different. She seems different. You say to your friend, "You know man, I was just thinking how cool Kathy is. I really want to stick with her." Then she comes over, and sits with you. And its like "Wow, I actually have this girl with me. This is awesome".

Haa - she's no different than she was an hour ago when you were sick of her.

But when you can tell that someone doesn't need you, they just SEEM different. There's something about it that's hard to articulate. But what it boils down to, is that all of a sudden, this person's attention has become a source of validation for you. And as a result, they seem more attractive. (BTW: I use the paragraph before this one as a killer routine in sets, except I take out the part about stagnation and focus more on how I know that I appreciate someone and the positive sides of it).

In addition to the validation issue, there are basic genetic/status explainations and accounts for why hard to get guys are appealing. Very basically, guys who are sexually pre-selected by other girls because of their genetics and/or social status will be hard to get, because they can't be bothered with chasing women. They simply walk around, and girls chase them. Chasing a girl is in some ways subcommunicating that you are not one of these guys. If you go to the high class venues in Los Angeles, the mere act of actively picking up is looked down on by the highly socially proofed guys. They'll say things like "That guy over there is trying to pull ass. Kick him out."