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A Seduction Routine that Make Her Love You For Life

author: "Mystery"
date: Fri, 04 Dec 1998 05:00:00 GMT
newsgroup: alt.seduction.fast
subject: Re: Pickup Lines NEVER To Use

>Check around the ATM's in the business districts like Wall Street for ATM receipts that people leave behind. Try to find one with some ridiculous balance. Over 60k would be cool.

OHHHH! Fucking SNEAKY DUDE! Love it. This is great when doing a # exchange. She takes the # and when she sees the balance she will LOVE YOU for LIFE. She will think you are RICH as hell and when you don't spend money on her she will think you are TESTING her.

Moaaa hahahahaha. I fucking LOVE IT!

By Mystery

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 But at last you have the offending wool in hand and pull it back on your foot with a pained but satisfying grunt. All that remains to be done now is to extract yourself from your compressed posture.
Alas, the gentle slope you selected for a bedsite begins to take an active and aggressive role in compounding your plight. You topple over onto your side.
With herculean effort and gasped curses that would provoke envy in a Marine drill sergeant, you manage to roll onto your knees. This is immediately determined to be a mistake, since it leads to a series Of flopping somersaults down the incline, which becomes increasingly steeper. You come to restjammed under a fallen tree fifty feet or so away from your starting point.
In the morning your companions get up, stare with some puzzlement at your vacated Ensolite pad, shrug and begin preparing breakfast.
Eventually you are discovered under the tree and extricated. At this moment you can either suffer ridicule or you can make the appropriate comment and earn your companions' everlasting respect and esteem.
(“Everlasting” nowadays means approximately two weeks.) What, then, is the proper response in this situation? Whining and inane jabber about a partially pulled-off sock simply won't cut it, particularly if you insist upon hobbling about in the posture of a chimpanzee with lumbago.
Here's what you do: Smile, yawn, stretch luxuriously, and, as soon as your vertebrae cease their popping and pinging, say with a slightly lascivious chuckle, “Boy, I didn't think they made dreams like that anymore!”
SITUATION—The bush pilot returns to pick up you and your companion after a week of fishing on a wilderness lake. “Now you fellas are about to enjoy some real sporty flying,” he says. “Did you notice how on my takeoff from here last week I had to flip this old crate over on her side when I went between those two tall pine trees and then how I stood her right up on her tail to get over that ridge?” He now doubles over with laughter and pounds his knee as you and your partner exchange glances. “Well,” the pilot continues, “with the two of you and your canoe and all your gear on board, the takeoff is gonna be a little tricky this time. What I was wonderin‘ is if maybe I could get each of you fellas to straddle a pontoon, and if we come up a little short on the ridge there, maybe you could just sort of walk us right on over the top. How does that strike you?”

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